Chop, chop!

I’m medium good at a whole bunch of things, but a couple of things that I’m REALLY good at is making blood and growing hair. Everyone poops, but it’s rewarding that my body is excellent at turning delicious food into something that benefits others. I started donating blood with my dad when I was in my teens, but only started donating hair in the last 15 years.

When I was in my 30s a new hair stylist admired my hair. “Your hair would be SO PERFECT to make a wig! People pay a LOT of money for human hair!”

“Oh, I KNOW! My ancestors in China used to make their living selling hair! This is how they earned money to come to the United States many years ago.”

“Oh, my gosh, REALLY?”

“No, not really.”

Man, white people are SO MUCH FUN! You can tell them practically anything and they will believe you. I can’t even count how many people have believed that Albert and I have an arranged marriage. I have a TON of fun messing with non-Asian people.

A friend of mine had this pink scooter that kept breaking down. She LOVED this scooter, but it was a lemon. Her husband suspected that the problems stemmed from substandard manufacturing in China.

“Oh, yes. That makes a lot of sense, but I don’t think it’s the manufacturing,” I explained to him.

“Why?”

“Because in China, pink is the color of….well, chumps. So anything that is pink would likely be made in a substandard manner. But the other colors would not.”

Yes, I told him that I was joking. Eventually.

So I cut off a ton of hair today and my stylist donated it. It feels FREE and COOL! Most people don’t understand how HOT and ITCHY it is to have thick hair blanketing your back. That dark hair absorbed solar energy and made me sweat! Along with my hot flashes, I was overheating constantly. I’m excited to be rid of it, and also really honored that I am able to hand it over to someone who might appreciate it much more than I do.

I know a lady who has a human hair wig, and it looks adorbz. When she first started shopping for wigs, she was surprised to learn that most human wigs are made from Chinese or Indian hair. I LOVE the idea that my hair might be on her head. It looks way cuter on her than it ever did on me.

“Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as ever you can.” Who’s to say that John Wesley wasn’t talking about hair??

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